When my little ones are watching TV these days, they aren’t interested in the traditional networks. They seldom even ask for Nick Jr. or Disney anymore. Instead, they want Netflix. As it plays, every so often, it asks, “Are You Still Watching?” and I have to go push the button on the remote. Well, actually, I’ve taught Damion to do it himself, but I still do it for the others.
The other day, it occurred to me that my blogs are sitting here asking, “Are you still there?” Every so often, Facebook tells me I haven’t posted to my writing page in a while and I really should do something. I just don’t seem to find the time….or, actually, I just haven’t been making the effort.
So, today, I’ve decided I need to let the world know that I am still functioning, just not as efficiently as I should. So, here I am. It’s Sunday afternoon. I don’t have any childcare responsibilities, I have decided to skip the Veteran’s Day parade, the church website is updated. I have checked email and Facebook. The supper menu is simple and only takes about half an hour to fix. It’s quiet and I need to get back to writing.
Actually, I’ve been thinking about it for a month or so. Jim nags me every once in a while because I’ve left posting to the Roadtrip blog that we share entirely up to him for months. My reminders to check the Flash Fiction sites for prompts every week still pop up regularly.
I do have the time. Not always in predictable blocks, but it could be organized. I usually have from around 9am until 1pm on Monday, the whole day after around 9am on Wednesdays, all day Saturdays and most Sunday afternoons free. Plus, on Thursday and Friday between 11am and 2pm, I mostly only have Elaina, who is four, and doesn’t require a lot of attention. In addition, Ashley (Damion and Elaina’s mom) gets off work at 4pm. I am almost always free by 4:30 every day.
I could be writing. I have, at least, a couple of hours every day. I just haven’t felt inspired. No, that’s an excuse. I’ve just been stagnating, drifting in a swamp of disorganization. Using the excuse of playing taxi for the kids to avoid exercising my brain. Instead, I have been reading for hours every day.
So, yes, I am still here. I’ve just been watching instead of doing, reading instead of writing. I will force myself to step outside the inertia of the past few months and make my presence known. Stay tuned for further updates.